Posted in poems

Masquerade 

Everyone is dancing, singing, drinking

Behind my mask, I am thinking

Suffocating, eager, waiting

To fulfill the plans I’ve been contemplating

Balcony, ledge, 100 feet high

Today is when I finally learn to fly

Behind my mask I smile

But these hidden eyes, they cry

Hugs and kisses. Good to see you

I’ve missed you, how are you, you look well and free to

Do as you please and conquer the world

The things in passing they say to this girl

But this girl isn’t me

It’s who they think me to be

While I am in trance, responding robotically

My only wish was for them to know who I really was

For them to know that the posts and the likes and the pictures

Are only because

I know what they want and feed their imagination

Through pride I hide my true sorrow and indignation

But woulda, coulda, shoulda

It’s all too late

If only someone has heard the pleas for help

My potential was great

I was only lonely but too lonely to bare

There was no escape

The best of intentions just isn’t enough

When the actions are scarce and their words are just…stuff

So please excuse me, I need some fresh air

My politeness has no second thought

They don’t even notice me walking there

I kick off my shoes and remove my coat

Deep breathes, eyes closed and I imagine how it’ll feel to float

No turning back now, my mind is made

Each beautiful color is already grayed

I’m sorry, my dear

To leave you here

The only one that loves me for sure

But only by default I fear

I stand on the ledge as they pay me no mind

Disturbing tranquility

Excitement

Arms spread like an eagle

I leap

Falling

I’ve used all my time

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